Monday, October 10, 2011

2011 Chopps Update #17 Jose Constanza

We have seen many protests against the war and against Wall Street in recent weeks, but I am going to address another protest here today- a protest against bouncers who prevented dancers from pogoing in clubs in the early 80's. Written as a protest against the aforementioned bouncers, as well as a call for freedom of expression, "The Safety Dance" by Canadian band Men Without Hats peaked at #3 in Billboards Hot 100 chart. The video, featuring a disturbing midget (who has his own Facebook page, apparently), a maypole, and Punch and Judy puppet show (among other things) is pure 80's, and checked in at #17 on VH1's 100 Greatest One Hit
Wonders of the 80s. While I had not heard of "Boom Boom Boom, Let's Go Back to My Room" or the guy who sang it, I am familiar with this song. So familiar with it was I, that my wife and I spoofed it when my daughter was just a toddler. Our version, The Baby Dance, was much better. Believe me.

The only protest that surrounded 2011 Braves one-hit wonder (?) Jose Constanza had to do with the fact that he came up from AAA in July, caught lightning in a bottle, and caused phenom
Jason Heyward to ride the bench for a few weeks. Certain fans didn't like it, and voiced their opinion loudly. Who knows, perhaps time will show that Heyward was a one-hit wonder in 2010. Anyway, like the previous one-hit wonder, Bob "Hurricane" Hazle, Georgie (Jose's nickname, after George Constanza on Seinfeld) toiled in the minor leagues for years before getting his shot at the major league level. Making his Braves debut on July 29th (which was the same date Hazle made his Braves debut), and wearing #17, Constanza made the most of his opportunity while providing a much-needed boost to the team. Utilizing his ability to put the ball into play, Georgie used his greatest asset (his speed) to put pressure on opposing pitchers and defenders- and that success at getting on base translated into Braves wins. Until an ankle injury on August 22nd forced him to the bench, Constanza had hit .372 and stole seven bases. After the injury, Jose hit only .129 in 31 at-bats (over 19 games), and was 0-2 in stolen base attempts. I won't say that the team's collapse was due to its hottest hitter getting injured, but it is interesting to see the success of the team when Constanza was healthy and starting (16-7) compared to after his injury (11-21). I was very disappointed that Topps didn't include a card of the speedy Constanza in its recent Update set-perhaps a card that featured him licking his bat would have been a popular one.
Since they overlooked him, I've decided to give him his own card; unfortunately, I had a heck of a time trying to match the font used for the players' names.


  1. Constanza deserved a card in this year's Update set. I like Heyward, but if Constanza out plays him for the starting right field job next season then so be it. It's too early to say if either player is a one hit wonder.

    Speaking of Update, I'm so happy to see Eric O'Flaherty, Brooks Conrad & David Ross were in the set.

  2. I'd love to have a Constanza card in my collection. If he doesn't stick around Atlanta, he'd sure look good in black and gold. ;)

  3. You're right, Colbey, it is too early to speculate on either player being a flop, which is why I included the question mark. It's easy to say that this summer was a fluke, since he is 28 years old-but sometimes guys take longer to develop or just get outside of the numbers game. Hope he can stick around-he is an exciting player. As far as black and gold- I think Derek Lowe would look really good in those colors. Say, for Andrew McCutchen? Yeah-right!