Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Those Wacky Walmartites

  My daughter asked me during dinner this evening if I would take her to (of all places) Walmart. She wanted to get some arts and crafts stuff to decorate a pumpkin for a contest at school-and being a daddy's girl, she got her wish.

  As some of you might know by now, I loathe Walmart. The only thing good about the super-center is that it has cards. And people.

  So while I may no longer buy many packs or boxes to open (which, at this point in my collecting journey is done more for entertainment than for set building), I know that if I leave the store with nothing to open, I can always count on experiencing a different form of entertainment: people watching.

  Watch enough and you will see twelve, thirteen Honey Boo Boo's.

  More common are the folks who look like the poor child's parent(s).

  One fellow behind me tonight was a dead ringer for Badger, the meth-head/dealer on Breaking Bad. He had the hair, the eyes, the stubble on the face. Heck, he even had the gravely voice. Only instead of buying mass amounts of pseudophedrine, this dude was buying large bags of chips, a case of Red Bull, and telling his buddy about the release of Call of Duty: Black Ops II. Clearly, he was loading up for a long night.

  Of course, there's also the forty-three year old man buying the pack of Topps Wacky Packages. That would be *ahem* me.

  For the life of her, I don't think my daughter could understand why her father would spend money on such non-sense. Two bucks ain't much, but it's still two bucks, right?

  Well, it took a while to work our way home, but I think she finally got it once I opened the pack and she saw the shiny corn butts sticker. I guess eleven-year old boys and forty-three year old men aren't the only ones with sophomoric humor.

  Well, baseball may be my mistress-but I grew up on Mad Magazine, enjoyed some of the Wacky Packs back in the day, and still have a great appreciation for parody and satire.




  1. Love Wacky Packages... but gotta ask. What the heck is a Honey Boo Boo?

    1. oops- forgot to put my answer under 'reply'...

  2. It's the nickname of a little girl on a TLC 'Reality Show' (Here Comes Honey Boo Boo). There's a lot of outcry about the exploitation of her by her mother. She's an eight (?)year-old 'beauty queen' pageant contestant, whose mother lets her drink these concocted energy/sugar drinks-there's much more to it than that... Basically, it's just a really dysfunctional family situation. You Tube it for a better picture.

    1. Thanks for the information. That's a shame. I can definitely see the reason for outcry. But you're dealing with a guy who didn't like the way those eight kids had to deal with parents like John and Kate on television screens across the country.

      Lol... just another reason I stay away from reality tv and stick to shows with blood and gore: The Walking Dead, Game of Thrones, etc.

    2. Amen. Love Walking Dead, too.

      Haven't seen Game of Thrones. I bought the first novel for my Kindle and have read about a third of it. When I realized how many novels there are and the length of them- well, I don't know if I'm up for it. Not a huge fan of that genre...

    3. Game of Thrones is a series of novels? J/K. Yeah... I'm not a big reader (outside of blogs), so I stick to the HBO series.